December is marbled with tradition. Probably more so than any other time of year. Now, I’m as much a sucker for sentiment as anyone, but perhaps we ought to rethink the notion. 
According to Merriam-Webster, tradition is the handing down of information, beliefs, and customs by word of mouth or by example from one generation to another. This is a fancy way of saying we tend to do what we’ve always done over and over. Don’t get me wrong, family traditions are important. They create bonds and gives us a sense of connection and comfort.
We all have our own special customs. My aunt and uncle owned a Christmas tree farm. Every year, our family would troop there to buy a fresh-cut pine tree (Dad couldn’t abide the idea of anything but a “real” tree). For decades, my grandmother celebrated the season with the entire extended family at her home on Christmas Eve – the only time I ever saw my cousins. For almost as long, my mother hosted a not-to-be-missed Christmas Day breakfast.
But time sneaks in. People move away. Loved ones die. Life happens.
In due time, the Christmas tree farm was sold. Dad passed on, followed years later by Grandma and Mom. My kids grew up and needed to split time between their original family and the one they’d married into.
As each change happened, the first Decembers felt oddly uncomfortable. Scratchy as a wool sweater on bare skin. We had to learn the skill of adapting. I succumbed to the lure of an artificial tree. My sister took over Christmas breakfast. A schedule was worked out so the kids could share the cheer without feeling guilty. Our holiday time had to be reimagined.
In 2020, COVID brought new challenges and changes. Last year we went to a drive-through light show (something we’d never done before), because it was about the only festive activity available. Turns out, we liked it so much we did it again this year. A new tradition? I suspect so. 
No matter how treasured your traditions have been, the ability to revamp is critical to well-being. Much as I love memories from past holidays, it isn’t possible to replicate them, so the blessed flexibility of adjusting to current times and situations has made all the difference.
One thing is for sure, a Red Ryder Carbine Action 200-shot Range Model air rifle could shoot your eye out… or maybe it won’t.
Our lives are guaranteed to change, so we can’t let fear or disappointment prevent us from taking a chance on a fresh idea.
You may just find a brand-new tradition can become as valid and special and fulfilling as an old one.
Sending my warmest wishes to you all!
I’d love to know. How have your traditions modified over the years?
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Pat Wahler is the author of Western Fictioneers’ Best First Novel of 2018, I am Mrs. Jesse James. She is also the author of a contemporary romance series, The Becker Family Novels, and a collection of holiday-themed stories, Let Your Heart be Light: A Celebration of Christmas.
Pat is a frequent contributor to the Chicken Soup for the Soul series.
11 Responses
Merry Christmas, Pat!
Merry Christmas to you, Karen! Hopefully we can make a meet-up happen in 2022.:-)
A wonderful post, Pat. Our traditions began to change last year, especially, because of the pandemic. This year my family is a bit more scattered around, so our traditions are in flux. We hope to make new ones as the years go by, but for now we enjoy what we can every day and are thankful for the time we can spend with loved ones this time of year. The one thing that is constant now and has been for a very long time is the reason we celebrate Christmas, and that’s an important thing to hold onto. Merry Christmas and much happiness to you in 2022.
Very sound approach, Amy. It’s hard to realize things must change, but a definite fact of life. Have a wonderful and blessed Christmas!
Pat–Marbled with tradition… Time sneaks in… Your post was so well crafted. Toward the end, I got teary, thinking of what the holiday used to be–when my parents were still alive, when the kids were young.
For us, the holiday has gotten smaller, more intimate. More casual. Most of the changes are born of necessity. We have a tiny house. The kids have scattered. We’ve extended the holiday, so Christmas this year–for part of the family–will be celebrated a week early because that is when my son and his family will be in town. Does it matter what the calendar says? We say no. All that matters is that we’re together…
Have a wonderful holiday, Pat. Have I missed your announcement about your upcoming book… or is that still in the future?
Always great to hear from you, Sioux!
I love that you’ve distilled the season into a single word – together. 🙂
Best of the season to you and yours, and no, I haven’t announced publication yet. Finishing up edits and then the manuscript goes out on submission. We shall see what happens!
Merry Christmas to you and yours Pat. Sadly, here, it’s just another day.
Wishing you a most blessed Christmas, Dave. It was fun to visit with you at the reunion!
P.S. You’re a music guy. Turn up those old-time Christmas tunes and sip a cup of cheer. I think the older we get the more important it is to make our own merry. 🙂
Pat, your post made me nostalgic wishing for the dayswhen I lined all the small grandkids up on the basement staiurcase to take a group photo. Now they wouldn;t fit shoulder to shoulder standing.
Covid and time has altered our plans, too. Last year and this year as well, we will be visiting each of our four children and their families on different days. It won’t be the same, but it will be special with each family. Plus, I am not the hostess for the second time in 28 years. But there is a summer barbeque bash scheduled for sure.
Changing times, right?
All the events used to be at my house, but it’s been parceled out the last few years, and Covid certainly had an impact. Nevertheless, we soldier on, privileged to still wake up in the morning and enjoy the season. 🙂